Canceling All My Fears: Bridging the Gap Between Fear and Curiosity
Right before the holidays, I floated the idea to my cousin that we should do a new photoshoot with her kids. A few years had elapsed since we did the first one in my garden, and as I planned the shots, thought through locations, and considered the best ways to capture their little personalities, I found myself reflecting on just how much these “little” personalities had grown.
Alanna is a fearless, precocious burst of energy, eager to socialize and connect—sharing her vibrancy with the world. Alyssa, on the other hand, takes her time. She’s shy, observant, cautious—thinking through causal relationships with a wisdom far beyond her years. Over the past year, though, I’ve noticed a shift: her hesitancy has started to wane, and an eagerness to step out of her comfort zone and embrace new experiences has emerged. The girls have this incredible connection, their personalities seemingly engineered to challenge and harmonize with one another.
The day of the shoot came, and as I was driving them into the city, Mini’s tiny voice took on a new confidence as she said, “Tori, I used to be afraid to drive on bridges, but I’m not afraid of that anymore. I’m canceling all of my fears.”
“You’re canceling all of your fears?” I asked, amazed.
“Yeah, I’m canceling all of my fears.”
That statement, delivered with the clear-eyed profundity of a four-year-old, has been etched into my mind ever since…
“I’m canceling all of my fears.”
The fear of failure—making the wrong decision, falling short of your ability, embracing a new process or medium, working to the very edge of your current capabilities and understanding—digs at the edges of our comfort zones. These moments of confrontation challenge us to lead with curiosity. Fear can make us dig in our heels, keeping us from seeing change as an opportunity for growth. But when we face it tactically, fear becomes a bridge—one that takes us from where we are to where we could be.
Here are a few things I’ve been reminding myself:
Don’t stop asking questions when an answer fits your expectation. Push yourself to explore beyond “good enough.”
Look for opportunities to qualify and engage, not disqualify and dismiss. Your curiosity is as much about connection as discovery.
Raising a hand is a small act, but a showcase of effort and commitment to growth nonetheless. Whether it’s sharing an idea, trying a new medium, or taking creative risks, even small steps build momentum.
Remember to confront your fears—or cancel them—asking: Am I truly crossing the bridge, or am I just uncomfortable because I’ve paused and am standing at the edge?
